Now, before I get a lot of nasty emails from women saying this is just not right, how would you react to a man who is 300 pounds, lives in his parents’ basement, works part-time, and dresses only in black telling you he’ll only date super hot, super thin women who make more money than he? There are many versions of this, but I want to focus on “The Rules,” the book that set feminism back 20 years.Would you tell him never to settle and to hold strong to his expectations? agrees, calling it “sexist garbage.” Here are a few gems: Is your head steaming yet?Many articles and people instruct guys to tell women what to do.
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Then maybe she’ll take her headphones off on her own. In a recent article titled “Why You Should Refuse to Lower Your Standards 100% of the Time,” the author goes on at length, with much capitalization and exclamation points, about why you never settle and you’ll always regret it if you do.
First off, “never” and “always” should be stricken from the dating vocabulary. Secondly, there’s a big difference between settling and having realistic expectations.
Many men reading this advice think if they just keep throwing compliments at a woman, they won’t have to work on getting to know her or showing her who they are.
Women know when you’re full of shit and just saying something to butter them up. Definitely go ahead and compliment her, but tell her why you’re complimenting her. That color of blue reminds me of the ocean, which I love visiting.” Now about the asking of questions.
Unfortunately, thousands, if not millions, of women attempted these rules and ended up alone like the divorced author. I don’t have time to deal with someone who is purposely trying to be difficult, taciturn, and closed off.
One should be busy having a fulfilling life, and thus it might take a few calls to nail down a date, but not just because you think you need to.Yes, the first date or so should be lighter and more entertaining and not the time to drop all of your baggage.But if I’m not getting any enthusiasm, or someone is just brushing off my getting-to-know-you questions, then I’m moving on to the next date. Yes, compliments are a nice thing but only if they’re sincerely given with no agenda.One of my female friends told me about a date she went on this week.He kept saying to her “So tell me more.” No matter what they were talking about, it was “So tell me more.” He obviously memorized something he thought would work and just repeated it ad nauseum. This is my all-time (anti)favorite worst dating advice.I’m not advocating to throw out all of your wants and needs — just make sure they’re realistic.