It’s the fault of a culture that gives a detailed education on how to look sexy or even act in specific sexy ways (talk like this, say that), but fails to teach us how to be a sexual person.This leads to a disconnect between a person’s “sexual side” and the person they are around others most of the time.
When human beings don’t get our basic needs met, we don’t feel secure…
it’s not surprising that people who are looking for sexual intimacy from a place of insecurity — or perceived scarcity — are described as “thirsty.” When we’re communicating our own feelings of lacking more than our sexual feelings, the words “slut” and “creep” are tossed out most often.
Because these confusing feelings are so often partnered with our attempts to flirt, before we can even talk about what sexual communication is, we have to first untangle the mess of what it isn’t.
The first confusing feeling people associate with flirting is anxiety.
There are some cultures where the majority of individuals do not suck at flirting, but most people don’t come from those cultures.
If it were just you, it’d be your fault — but it’s not.
When we’re not repressing or muddling those feelings in the ways described above, these feelings are some of the most pleasureable feelings on the planet.
I’ve exchanged nothing more than eye contact that was more pleasurable than a lot of the sex I’ve had.
The final confusing feeling commonly associated with flirting is expectation.
Like anxiety, this feeling that’s often confused with sexuality stems from your tendency to jump into your head to avoid your feelings.
When a guy asks me why I didn’t get her number, he’s missing the point.