Let’s face it: A person is not going to agree to a date simply because you’re interested.
“He actually seemed like an OK guy from his profile, but his email skeeved me out.” Hopefully, you know better, but even PG-praise can often come across as forced or simply too eager.
So definitely give a compliment or two — like on a great smile — but don’t overdo it or it may read like fan mail.
You’re at an informational advantage: You know both parties, and usually you know why the two should get to know each other. Because you know each of the recipients, they will feel social pressure to at least respond (whether you intend this or not). The email chain would look like this: From: Ben To: Jason Subject: Getting to know Christina Hey Jason, We talked about my friend Christina at lunch. Feel free to contact her at: [email protected] say I recommended you contact her.
The worst introductory emails make busy people resent having to respond to someone who they (1) don’t know and (2) aren’t sure why they’re being introduced to them. Let me know if you end up meeting with her – Ben From: Jason To: Christina CC: Ben Subject: Greetings from fellow author in Baltimore / Ben Casnocha recommended I contact you Hi Christina, Ben Casnocha recommended I contact you.
“In her email, one girl asked if I’d seen the game the night before and actually mentioned some of the highlights.
Right there, I knew we’d have something to talk about on a first date.” Even if you don’t share a love of Moroccan cuisine or kung fu movies, expressing a desire and curiosity to learn more will get that prospect’s attention as well.
[Demonstrate commonality and also note that both are in the same time zone, to make next step logistics easier.] Ryan – will you follow up with Michelle over email to set up a phone call? Fortunately for you, you get the luxury of waiting for the non-busy person to send a followup.
(Since so many people don’t, this is an effective filter to screen out people who won’t even respond to an introductory email.) Here’s the next part of the email thread: From: Ryan To: Michelle BCC: Neil [Notice how Ryan has moved Neil to the bcc line – this allows Neil to see the follow up without having to be copied on all the future back-and-forth.] Thanks for the introduction, Neil.
(Moving you to the BCC line.) [The recipient should always thank the sender.