Still others will be unpleasantly needy or put all of their focus on just trying to find someone to sleep with, instead of dealing with them as people.
Small wonder that they have issues finding that first sex partner; it’s their that ends up causing them problems, rather than their relative state of inexperience.
The problem is that – for the most part – these fears are .
The fear for guys is that by being a virgin past this nebulous date, they will have not only missed their chance to sew their wild oats – because of course, nobody over the age of 35 has no-strings-attached sex but they will be so clearly marked as “damaged goods” that no woman would possibly want them.
They live in fear that no woman would want to have to “show them the ropes” and as a result, their lack of experience will leave them completely incapable of living up to the demands and expectations of a more-experienced partner; thus they have effectively aged out of the dating market and are doomed to die alone, unloved and having never been naked with a girl.
For some, it’s a quest to lose our virginity the night of The Big School Event (Homecoming, Prom, Spring Formal, what-have-you) because it’s part of the modern high-school mythology that we’ve made up.
For others it’s trying to beat a particular date – our 18th or 21st birthdays, high-school or college graduation, before summer’s over, before getting married.
Because of all of the importance placed on the concept of virginity, people are convinced that having passed some arbitrary cut-off point that they have rendered themselves utterly unfuckable and have somehow missed on a critical aspect of growing up.
They may get older but they will never truly be Virginity has an outsized level of influence in Western culture, especially in countries with large conservative religious communities; the idea of sex and “purity” get completely intertwined and then but up against gender roles that completely contradict those values.
A flawed article in an issue of Newsweek sent women into paroxysms of fear of spinsterhood when it claimed that women who weren’t married by 40 would be married and had better odds of being killed by terrorists.
In Japan, there are references to a woman as a “Christmas cake” – it may look tasty, but nobody wants it after the 25th.
You are no wiser, more mature or otherwise changed from who you were minutes beforehand; the only difference is that you now have a set of memories that you didn’t have before and the need to shower and change the sheets.
Having had sex doesn’t validate you as a person, nor does it somehow confirm that you have worth or that you’ve been devalued by the experience.
but because he’s never managed to actually penetrate a woman, he’s still obsessed with “childish” things.