But I’m interested in having a conversation about labels and implicit bias and trans-inclusive language.
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I’m a big of fan of affirmative consent, and you should never feel pressured to have sex with somebody. This is not saying, “You have to have sex with a trans woman, or you’re cissexist.” It’s saying that you should examine the societal influences on your preferences.
There’s a massive difference between honing in on individual scenarios and considering wider societal issues and attitudes. You’re allowed to have your preferences, and you don’t to change anything.
But there’s more to it than that, and ignoring the deeper issues by stopping at a surface-level analysis doesn’t do this issue any justice.
Like, you’re allowed to have a lot of things – you’re allowed to have prejudice towards trans people, but that doesn’t mean you should.
Dennis has covered the issue of discriminatory dating preferences before – and she’s gotten all kinds of responses that show that people have a hard time with this issue when it comes to trans folks. At its most basic, cissexism means prejudice or discrimination against transgender people.
So if you think she’s being homophobic, upholding rape culture, or any of these other common ideas, check out what she has to say about genital preferences now. So what’s been happening is that some people are making the argument that it’s not cissexist at all to only be attracted to people with one kind of genitals.
You’ll always be able to find gay people who spout anti-gay rhetoric.
You can even find people of color who openly advocate racist policies. Having a trans friend doesn’t mean you’re suddenly an expert on trans issues.
That’s because these accusations of homophobia make it sound like I’m trying to convince lesbians to like men, but I’m not. And if you think that’s what I’m arguing, you’re simultaneously strawmanning my argument and implying that trans women are men.
I’m trying to show that preferences for women with vaginas over women with penises might be partially informed by the influence of a cissexist society. This is honestly the worst response that I’ve heard and probably the most cissexist one.
Obviously that would be anti-gay for any straight person to say, and it’s also not okay for gay people to advocate that.