The problem with this approach is that, frankly, that’s not .Trying to be someone who is diametrically opposed to who you are inside is a recipe for frustration and failure.
Similarly, it’s inadvisable for an introverted person to try to force themselves to act like an extrovert, especially in the dating scene.
It’s incongruent with who they are; they’re quite literally pretending to be someone they’re not in hopes of better results.
You’re not getting any responses from your online dating profile. Over the years I’ve seen these issues crop up again and again; I’ve seen them in friends, in the letters I’ve gotten as Dr.
and until I took the time to recognize this and actually address these issues, I was going to get better.
On a practical level, desperation hurts you in a multitude of ways.
You’re less likely to meet someone you would consider you will be turned off when they realize that any warm body will do and still more will assume that there must be a reason why you’ve been refused so often.If you believe no woman could possibly find you attractive, you will elide over all evidence to the contrary – women flirting with you, giving you the “come-hither” stare or even just smiling at you – and focus like a laser on every incidence of negativity.You will see every interaction in the worst possible light: “she doesn’t like me, she’s clearly repulsed by me, she’s only being polite, I’m misreading the signals” This apparently unending stream of reinforcement will only serves to perpetuate a vicious cycle; your self-limiting beliefs cause you to overlook evidence to the contrary, thus reinforcing the belief which, in turn, continues to make it impossible to see the truth. Believing in yourself – that you’re attractive, that you have a lot to offer others, that you can you.It can be tempting to rationalize this away: after all, why wouldn’t someone take being desired as a compliment?But then: when you say will do, you’re saying that you don’t give a damn about the individual.There’s nothing less appealing to a potential partner than feeling as though that they’re nothing more than a warm hole or body that’s filling a slot marked “girlfriend”.